What is the truth and what is a lie? One thing I do know for certain is that I am not the liar here. I am the one standing here with my truth. Alone. Choices.. we all have them.. choices - the right ones are never the easy ones... with that being said... I have my answers, it's the fact that I am sitting here by myself. Feeling used, abused, lied to... and in my faith... he lied to me and used what I believe... to do this do me. I am the fool. No doubt about that. Did I believe? Absofukinlutely. Do I regret it? Not for a moment? Am I sorry he turned out to be what everyone said he was? Oh yeah. But we cannot change who or what people are. They have to live with what they do, we don't. I will be fine. I just can never see him again. I will never try again, that I am certain. Not with or for anyone. I have things to do and I don't have time for this shit...
What lies beneath? A freaking silent scream and a hurt that I cannot even seem to express. Ugh, I want to hate but won't allow that - just wish them all the best and move on. Again, let's pray karma is kind... and I am trying to be. Just leave me alone and stay away. Give me the space and time to get the hell away from it all.
Leaving for KY tomorrow. Going to see my brother. Hopefully I can look for a job and a house while there and if the Gods are willing, fukin be gone from here quicker than expected. It's a move that is a must, time and distance.. a must. When you ask for answers from the spirits, God, be willing to accept the consequences.. I asked and I was given the answers. Now I just have to be the strong, solid woman I know that I am - no looking back. Heartsick and empty. Lesson learned.
Sorry for the sorrow ya'll.
I won't be on for a couple of days - will be in KY.
Love & light beautiful ones.
~ V ~
Charisma Dawn (Yeah that's me) - A Daily Dose of ?
