It's a struggle. I believed deeply and probably still do but am trying so very hard to just not feel anything, ya know? Had a terrible thing happen. To know someone is lying is one thing but to have the proof two weeks in a row to confirm what your heart and gut were telling you. It is so very devastating. How do I go on with what I know from here? seriously a bit of a sick joke if you only knew what I was talking about.
How do people live with themselves on being that kind of person? How do you lie and lie and cheat and cheat without regard to those you hurt in the end? How?! How do they just continue to do it over and over and over again? The excitement of the chase, of getting caught... really - is it worth losing someone or hurting someone this deeply? I really hope karma will be kind... I don't wish this shit on anyone.
Forgive and let go... let the universe have it because negativity breeds negativity... I just don't know what my next step should be. One month. I want out of this state and away from all this, I am a simple person and this place is eating me alive. Alone. I just want to be alone and live my life for whatever purpose the Goddess and Gods have for me... ha... a sick joke... A spiritual healer without a spirit. That's what I am... I need divine intervention or I'm afraid I will just be that person I am afraid of becoming. Dark and twisty.
So I breathe and try to let go of it... this pain... one day I will be fine. Just wish I could delete his number and the memories.
Charisma Dawn (Yeah that's me) - A Daily Dose of ?
